-rightnow-

How many times do we sit back and reminisce about the "good ol' days?" Whether it was childhood or high school or college or earlier years of marriage? 

And how often do we get caught up dreaming about the future and the hopes of what will be? Successful career, dream house, or perfect family? 

We often spend so much of our time living in our pasts or dreaming of the future that we kind of miss out on the right now.. I know I'm guilty. Wishing old memories to be present moments, thinking back on what "could have been," rewording conversations so I came across more wittily... Thinking of what it will be like when Hudson is in school, or when my kids are teenagers, wondering about how long I'm going to be living here and when we'll move again.... Maybe it's just part of the human condition but I find that we can easily spend too much time thinking about anything but the now.

I've recently been struck with the reality- we have NO idea when we're going to think back to this very moment and remember how sweet it was.. And wish we could have it back. Or that we could change something about it. 

And I know this isn't some new revelation that no one has thought of before, like I'm some deep philosopher who has stumbled upon some new idea about life, but it is certainly a new reality to me. Something I've always "known" but am really feeling a stronger grasp on.

I want to love the moments I'm in while I'm in them. Not be wondering about what its gonna be like in the future or wishing things were like they used to be. 

Granted, I do think there is some good to be said for both remembering the past and thinking of the future! I'm definitely not saying we shouldn't do it. That's part of the beauty of this life, being blessed to have memories worth reliving, and futures worth looking forward to- but my point, or at least what I've been realizing, is that spending too much time dwelling in those mindsets can bring an uncanny amount of sadness. Or depression. Or even downright bitterness. 

And my right now deserves some joy. 

Driving around on one of our little adventures with my little family yesterday I tried my best to focus my attention on the right now. I wanted to intentionally pay attention to the precious little moments that may (or may not) eventually be one of my "think back" memories.. I want to find the freedom in right now. Not yesterday or tomorrow..

I want to revel in the joy of right now.