Just because..

I remember sharing at the beginning of the year about my quest to end my struggle with Trichotillomania, and by end- I mean beat it. No longer have it in my life.

I can't say that I've been 100% successful, or even 100% dedicated some days, but I can tell you things are getting better. If I have my guess right, I'd say the longest I've lasted between pulls was 2 weeks! I'm still praying for deliverance and healing, and would love if you would also pray for me. That good old scripture isn't constantly quoted for nothing.. "when two or more are gathered.." I believe there is power in numbers, and also in confession, which is why I have shared this wonderfully humbling bit of my life with all of you. I genuinely have a desire to be better, to be free of this. And I SO look forward to the day when I can run my fingers through my hair and not wince.

Tash has been living with us for a bit over a month now and I have a few things to say in regards to that (shocker, right?). First off, can I just say, I LOVE having a sister. I've wanted it all my life and I finally have some in my life! (5 sisters!! Can you believe it!!??) And THIS one happens to be fantastic. (which yes, they all are, I'm just enjoying my time with this one) She is a trooper! Among many other wonderful attributes, she is being so steadfast- sleeping on our couch, dutifully looking for a job, not complaining about the lack of space until we move to the new place, not causing a fuss concerning her almost complete lack of privacy, and I MUST  mention- giving me breaks from life as a mom with Hudson. Date nights are a new thing in this household and I LOVE them! I look forward to many more to come :)

Aside from all those wonderful things listed above (and the many more I have yet to mention) I have absolutely adored getting to spend time with her and get to know her beyond occasional talks on the phone! Nic works a lot, and she is yet to find a job so more often than not its just me, Tash and Hudson hanging out and we always wind up having just a lovely time. And in case you're wondering, yes, I have got her hooked on Friends just like me. Didnt take much time at all ;)

We have our move-out date set for May 31 and I am just so excited for it. I've been packing over the past week or so and I am really feeling pretty confident that I have a good handle on all that still needs to be done. My mind is already racing with all of the different little projects I want to do when we get to the new place. Everything from attempting to build our own breakfast nook set (diner style booth), to stenciling the walls and organizing the linen closet. I think deep down, I am my very happiest when I am getting to create. Whether it be recipes, crafty things or music- that is where my heart finds true content. Being useful and making things better! Now, if only I could find a way to bring in some extra cash when doing this, then I'd be all set! ;)

Of course, no matter what it is I end up doing, I'm sure at some point I'll wind up posting some photos of the changes. I'm sure you'll be looking forward to that day just as much as I am.

I find it incredible that Hudson is already a whopping 8 months old. Is anybody else in shock about this?! How has this happened so quickly?! Everyone warned me- everyone said it would just fly by- and I even believed them. I didn't doubt it for one second. I just didn't think it would be THIS fast.  I mean, wow. I am just amazed. 

I saw a cool quote on some board on Pinerest the other day, and I'm thinking of making some sort of piece of art to hang in Hudson's new bedroom (a nursery to decorate! Yippee!!), it's says, "cleaning and scrubbing can wait til tomorrow, for babies grow up, we've learned to our sorrow. so settle down cobwebs, dust go to sleep-  I'm rocking my baby, for babies don't keep."

Isn't that just cute? I know I sometimes find myself fretting about the way my house looks, or the untidy nature of my countertops and I just think its important to remember to relish in the sweet moments I get to have with Hudson. Cause one day there will be more Hansen babies running around, more messes to clean, laundry will always be there.. But this moment, right now? The one where he is so preciously pressed against my heart, fast asleep... This will never ever come back. And that is just so very bittersweet.

I love being a mom. I think I've said that once or twice on here. And it just continues to become more and more true. Yes, there are moments of frustration, desperation, depression and sometimes even a little bit of anger finds its way in there (like when he is SO overtired and just won't take his bottle!!) but I'd say above all, it's an absolute blessing. He is such a wonderful baby. And I just can't seem to kiss him enough.

I'm looking forward to leading worship at Cc.tv next weekend. Tim and Amy are out of town and Nic will be working so.. It's all me. And "the guys," of course. But it's literally been YEARS since I led from the piano without Nic and I am just a little bit curious about how it's gonna go. I mean, I love to lead worship, no matter what the setting but... I feel like my confidence lies in the fact that I always have Nic playing with me, leading me. It should be fun! And also probably pretty humbling. but I will let you know how it went either way.. 



I think that should just about wrap it up for now.. Until next time, cheers and God bless!